Richard's Online Journal

Greetings and salutations. In case you were wondering, Richard Cobbett is a writer and journalist and producer of many other things involving words. He likes cats, hates spiders, and plays a lot of games. This is his website...

[09/06/08] This Week In Reality TV

Monday - Big Brother: Another ten ordinary people are charged with turning Britain into a fascist police state where ideas are illegal and dissent is mercilessly crushed by the forces of oppression. And winning the wet t-shirt contest, of course.

Tuesday - Dawn Gets Eaten: Journalist Dawn Porter sets out to find another ratings-stunt to wuss out of at the last second. She moves in with a trio of Welsh cannibals for a week of lowest common denominator programming masquerading as empowerment, but can she escape before she becomes the Dish of the Day?

Wednesday - Hell’s Kitchen: Chef Ramsay challenges his five remaining hopeful chefs to put something of themselves into their signature dish. Heart, lungs, liver, testicles or tongue - the choice is theirs! Plus! For the first time ever… on Hell’s Kitchen… see a sentence completed without interruption from a commercial break.

Thursday - Free Barabbas USA: Everyone’s favourite offense against God returns for a new series, and the stakes have never been higher. In the first episode, contestants fight it out on Death Row for the chance to walk away. Literally.

Friday - How To Look Good In A Burlap Sack: Alien hybrid Gok Wan continues making the world a more beautiful place by working through the list of Naked applicants who can’t be helped with a new dress and better nail polish, and hiding them from the public. His latest challenge, Nikki, who won’t be told that a boob-tube and hotpants aren’t the right outfit for a 21 stone ice-cream taster. Can he stop the population of Chiswick feeling sea-sick every time she goes jogging? Warning: Contains graphic scenes of ugly people being happy with their life.

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